Communicating Authentically

Once upon a time, there was a Scottish welder named Syd Banks, who lived in British Columbia, Canada. He was a married man with a ninth-grade education and the typical problems of a blue-collar worker. Legend has it that during a marriage counseling session, Syd was complaining about this and that, and the counselor asked him, “You know you’re just making this all up, right?” And Syd thought about that. He had an epiphany that became a philosophy he called the three principles.

When he shared his philosophy with his friends in town, people at first thought he was crazy, or eccentric. But they noticed that after talking to Syd about their problems, they felt better and had a greater ability to manage the problem on their own afterward. They started telling their friends to bring their life challenges to Syd.

Eventually Syd started writing and talking about the three principles full time, and many people in the field of psychology began to take notice, and it became a movement that lived beyond Syd himself.

The three principles have been described and illustrated by people more intelligent and insightful than I am. But, as much for myself as for the reader, here is my attempt to capture my understanding of this magical knowledge.

Three Principles: Mind, Thought & Consciousness

Mind

Syd described Mind as the source of life itself; the energy that powers all life and connects all things. It is the formless power behind creation; and the root of all wisdom. Some call this God, or Allah, or Divine Wisdom. It is what scientists refer to as the “unimaginable power” that created the singularity behind the Big Bang.

Mind is the source of all intelligence and well-being, to which we are all innately connected. Because of this, we each have everything we need within us to be well and live in peace.

What does Mind mean to you?

Thought

Another principle, thought, is just what it sounds like: what we think. Or, more accurately, it’s that we think.

Many people assume that external forces create their experience of life. They often feel powerless against feelings of anger, resentment, and bitterness. They think, “I wouldn’t feel what I feel if others didn’t act the way they act.”

When we touch something hot, sensory nerves in our skin instantaneously send impulses to our brain, which translates them into a physical sensation of pain. We react by snatching our hand from the heat so it won’t burn.

It’s exactly the same with psychological stimuli. When we see someone smile, our optic nerves send that information to be processed by the brain, which determines our response. If the person is someone we like, we smile back. But if the person is someone who has wronged us, we narrow our eyes suspiciously and wonder, “What has he done now?”

In other words, when we respond to people, events and situations, we’re not responding to those external forces but to what we think about them.

Millions of variables impact the neural networks our brains use to reach those instantaneous, reactive thoughts: past experiences, ingrained beliefs, cultural mores, opinions, etc. And if you have a particularly destructive pattern of behavior, might be worth doing the inner work or shadow work to find out what’s keeping you from breaking through those habits.

But at the heart of it is this: Our entire experience of life is brought to us through the medium of thought. The external world is neutral. It’s our thoughts that give it meaning.

Knowing that we‘re all just thinking our way through life allows us to question our responses and hold our habits and opinions just a bit more lightly.

Consciousness

The simple description of consciousness is the gift of awareness. To feel the experience of life, and to know that since I am the thinker, I create and control my experience.

Consciousness the bridge between the formless and the form; between mind and thought. Our level of consciousness is the degree to which we see and understand the relationship between reality and our own thinking. This creates the way we feel; our state of mine, or mood.

And it fluctuates, almost constantly. That’s normal. The more aware I am that my feelings reflect my level of consciousness, the better able I am to manage them – to pause and question my thoughts and feelings before reacting to something I that’s just in my imagination.

How could that pause benefit you?

The Spell

When I learned about these principles, it elevated my range of consciousness, which continues to rise as insights occur to me. I still have low moods and become angry, but I recover faster and take more accountability. Overall, I think I’ve become easier to live with. I know I’m happier than I used to be.

Many people, when they first hear about the principles, say, “Oh yes. The power of positive thinking. I know about that. Just think happy thoughts and our lives will become better.”  

But it’s not about changing your thinking or being positive.

Some people call this metacognition: simply about being aware of what you’re thinking, how that makes you feel, and how it affects your actions. That awareness, the simple act of noticing your thinking is enough to open the door to new insights. Once you start to see a better way to be, it just makes sense to start being that way.

And that’s the magic.

Did you enjoy this post? Please like, comment or share below. And check out other posts on my blog, “The Good Witch of the North Country.”

To learn more about the Three Principles:

Video: Genesis of the Three Principles: The Birth of a New Understanding

You Can Be Happy No Matter What, by Richard Carlson, PhD

Slowing Down to the Speed of Life: How To Create a Peaceful, Simpler Life From the Inside Out, by Richard Carlson and Joseph Bailey

What The F**K Are the Three Principles?: And 18 Other Questions From So-Called Wisdom, by Amir Karkouti

The Inside-Out Revolution: The Only Thing You Need to Know to Change Your Life Forever, by Michael Neill